THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS OF NARCISSISM
by Antonio C. Antonio
November 10, 2014
Sandy Hotchkiss have been a licensed therapist in Southern
California, USA in the last 30 years and authored a very popular self-help book
on narcissism. At present, Hotchkiss is
a member of the faculty of a psychoanalytic institute where she lectures on her
favourite topic: “The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism”. These are (http://www.news-medical.net/health/Seven-Deadly-Sins-of-Narcissism.aspx):
1.
SHAMELESSNESS:
Shame is the feeling that lurks beneath all unhealthy narcissism and the
inability to process shame in healthy ways.
2.
MAGICAL THINKING: Narcissists see themselves as perfect, using
distortion and illusion known as magical thinking. They also use projection to dump shame unto
others.
3.
ARROGANCE:
A narcissist who is feeling deflated may re-inflate by diminishing,
debasing, or degrading somebody else.
4.
ENVY: A
narcissist may secure a sense of superiority in the face of another person’s
ability by using contempt to minimize the other person.
5.
ENTITLEMENT:
Narcissists hold unreasonable expectations of particularly favourable
treatment and automatic compliance because they consider themselves
special. Failure to comply is considered
an attack on their superiority, and the perpetrator is considered an awkward or
difficult person. Defiance of their will
is a narcissistic injury that can trigger narcissistic rage.
6.
EXPLOITATION:
Exploitation can take many forms but always involves the exploitation of
others without regard for their feelings or interests. Often the other is in a subservient position
where resistance would be difficult or even impossible. Sometimes the subservience is not so much
real as assumed.
7.
BAD BOUNDARIES:
Narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others
are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or
may as well not exist at all. Those who
provide narcissistic supply to the narcissist are treated as if they are part
of the narcissist and are expected to live up to those expectations. In the mind of a narcissist, there are no
boundary between self and other.
Narcissism is defined as: (1) An excessive or erotic
interest in oneself and one’s physical appearance; (2) In Psychology: An extreme selfishness, with a grandiose view
of one’s own talents and a craving for admiration, as characterizing a
personality type; and, (3) In Psychoanalysis: Self-centeredness arising from
failure to distinguish the self from external objects, either in very young
babies or as a feature of mental disorder.
With these definitions, it would be easy to assume that narcissism is a
condition that may lead to a serious kind of “mental disorder”. Awareness, therefore, on this matter and
concern must be spread especially among netizens who are said to be, in lesser
or greater degrees, guilty of narcissism.
Guilty or not, it will also be a healthy exercise to be aware of the
seven deadly sins of narcissism.
Just my little thoughts…
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